Boundaries during pregnancy and postpartum can be really hard. Most of us women struggle with people pleasing in some form or fashion. It is usually with those we love the most. Setting up boundaries is super important during pregnancy and postpartum. It is something that you and your partner need to have discussions about.
- Who is going to be at the birth?
- Who can hold the baby after he/she comes out?
- Who is going to be allowed to babysit?
- What if someone is overstaying their welcome?
- What if someone is sick?
- What if someone is giving too many suggestions or not kind comments?
It is going to be easier to put up boundaries and then relax in the future than the opposite. Will it hurt people’s feelings? Maybe…That is why you need to be on the same page and stay communicating with your partner through it all.
Suggestions for setting boundaries? I personally like to look at the person’s love language and enneagram type. Knowing the person’s motivation for what they do can be really helpful. Most people want to be helpful but it doesn’t always translate super well. Then you hurt their feelings when you don’t allow them to “help”. Knowing a bit more about their personality and looking at your past experiences with this person/people can be helpful when deciding what boundaries to place and how.
It is ok to be “selfish” during this time while also remembering that people are super excited for you. Finding ways for those close to you to feel included is important, but not at the expense of your mental health or causing you to feel unsafe. Just like I tell my children, ‘Use your words’. Communicate what you are feeling and why. Then let it go.
Hire me! I work with clients as a Pregnancy and Postpartum Coach and have self-paced e-courses available. Meaning, I utilize my training as a Nutritional Therapist and Birth/Postpartum Doula to coach women through pregnancy and postpartum. I am your nutrition coach-doula-educator-planner-organizer-support person all wrapped up into one!! I meet with clients 1:1, 2-3 times a month to cover any questions, education, and support they need!
